This puzzle takes takes the format of the popular children's book
If You Give a Mouse a Cookie. Solvers are presented with a series of clues of consequences, prepended by
.... Given the fact that the title is appended with
..., solvers are meant to conclude that they read the title of the puzzle before each of clues.
Each clue has a duple that is meant to be read with the word a in between, for example with the first clue, it should be read as If you give your A a B, he'll appreciate the opportunity.... In each clue, a single word replaces the letters of each duple, making a punny sentence. In addition, the letter string AaB forms a new word.
These clues can be solved in any order. One potential break-in is the clue with the dupe (O,P). Stewie and Chris are brothers from the television show Family Guy, who have a sister named MEG. The rest of the clue talks about seems to clue to Meg getting a PHONE. When read out, solvers may then hear it as the word MEGAPHONE.
Knowing the fact that valid words will be made from the duples with the letter a in between can help the solver to fill any remaining clues they may have unfilled.
Turning to the string at the bottom for extraction, solvers are meant to index the number next to each capital letter into the word that letter represents. Doing so yields the cluphrase
EATS OR SONGBIRD EIGHT, which is to be read as
EATS OR SONGBIRD (8). The answer to this clue is the final answer to this puzzle.
